I know I haven’t posted in a long time, but the recent SCOTUS decision has drawn a lot of media attention. It has been impossible for me to get through my day without reading or seeing something about today’s ruling on same-sex marriage. As a radical queer gay man, I felt like I had to respond to the hype around the SCOTUS decision. To preface this post, I understand that sometimes marriage can be a means of survival. There is no question that marriage provides economic resources and gives spouses legal protections. But all of that begs the question as to why we give marriage and the law the legitimacy to dictate what resources, benefits, and protections we should be afforded in the first place. However, that is a discussion for another day.
[Trigger Warning – Angry Queer Ranting]
Now some liberal gays/lesbians and some “allies” will hate everything that I am about to write. But then again, my stomach has been churning from everything I have seen all day. So maybe this post will make you all as sick as you have made me, and I am ok with that. Even though some of you have been smart enough to realize that this “landmark” decision is not the end-all-be-all, some of you are still celebrating today as a day of progress. However, today’s decision is a set back for queer folks everywhere. While marriage quality may make the world better for white cis able-bodied gays and lesbians who desire to be good capitalist producers and consumers, it will make the future worse for all queer subjects that do not fit under the label of the ideal neoliberal subject. In fact, now our LGBT youth are going to grow up thinking that everything is great, because they can be like the straight folks too, and this scares me. There are already too many queer and non-queer people who do not know the history of anti-queer violence and queer political organizing, activism, and community building that has given us life and the passion to live another day.
Our real revolutionary potential is based on what makes us radically different. Discourses around marriage equality only seek to homogenize what it means to be a good citizen. The institution of marriage affirms the ideal nuclear family that produces and consumes so that capitalism can thrive at the expense of the poor and often times people of color domestically and abroad. Queers have a rich history of finding alternative ways to create familial bonds. We may have created alternative visions of the family because we have had to, to survive, but what we have produced is authentic, beautiful, and creative. And now some gays and lesbians are willing to throw that away to become like the straight cis folks.
Also, the need to seek legal recognition is dangerous. I have never understood why we need the state to tell us that our love for someone else is valid. It still baffles me that people celebrate their “legal recognition.” If you love someone, you love someone and to constantly seek legal recognition only gives institutions legitimacy to regulate our daily lives. Maybe I have just read too much Michael Foucault in my lifetime or something??? But lets get real, the legitimacy we give to legal institutions like the state allows them to more closely survey its citizens. People in positions of power and that run institutions get off to giving us rights, because it makes it easier to manage subjects that are seen as too unruly. Giving gays and lesbians the opportunity to marry is a strategy that waters down our flames that are a threat to those who attempt to impossibly make order out of a chaotic world.
Additionally, everything that I have read today has been saturated with human rights discourses that makes liberals and conservatives alike pretend that they have done us a favor and allow them to exist in a state of false reality thinking progress has been achieved. Yes, I get that not all gays, lesbians, and allies fit into this camp, but there is an over arching narrative that conveys that equality has been achieved. What does marriage equality mean when you can be fired for your sexuality or gender identity? What does marriage equality mean when the majority of homeless youth identity as LGBT? What does marriage equality mean when queer people of color are disproportionately targeted for police brutality? The list goes on … Now some of you are going to say, well this is the first step. This is not the first step. You watch, some folks are going to go on fighting the good fight, but real equality for queer people is not in the foreseeable future. All of this will fissile down within weeks and queer folks will continue to struggle to live another day.
Lastly, but probably most importantly, I am so tired of seeing all of these posts by “allies.” I won’t say that all allies are bad, because I know some allies that authentically care about assisting queer folks in fighting for true liberation. I also know some allies that are excited to be active in queer communities. However, there are a lot of you, especially in religious circles that seem to be allies because it is your “moral duty,” either because you think it is necessary to be a good person, or because your religious convictions compel you to. However, I have had way too many experiences with “allies” that are extremely uncomfortable talking about real queer issues or immersing themselves in queer communities and queer culture. You are the ally that maybe shows up to a pride parade, maybe goes to a gay bar with a friend once, maybe shows up to a political rally, or maybe talks about how you are down with the cause, but your actions reflect the opposite. NEWSFLASH!!! YOU ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING FOR QUEER PEOPLE! And just because we both have the capacity to love, does not mean that we are the same. If you really want to be an ally, immerse yourself in queer culture, because to be honest, we need a more queer world, and if you learn a little something for us, then the world might be a better place, however if are just here to show a little moral support, we don’t need you and I would appreciate if you exited the scene.
End rant.
Sincerely,
An Annoyed Queer
coperoge 
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